Recipe For Revenge

When someone purposefully hurts you, physically or emotionally, what is your first thought? What is your second thought? What are the thoughts that stay with you? Do you react with equal purposeful pain or more aggressive pain? Do you accept the infliction and avoid thinking about it in the future? Do accept the infliction and feel sad, humiliated or depressed? When you replay the event in your mind, how do you feel? Do you like the way you feel? Why?

According to the dictionary, revenge means "to inflict injury in return for" or "action taken in return for an injury or offense." Suppose you take harmful revenge against the person or organization that caused you pain. How do you feel after that? Do you have a clean conscience that you've done the right thing? Suppose you choose to ignore the situation although you felt pain. Do you feel good about that choice? Will either of these choices prevent you from feeling the same pain in the future?

"The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury."

Here's a challenging recipe for revenge that will surely put you on the winning side of the situation. The next time you are injured, emotionally or physically:

1. Create a dance. Picture your Self standing outside of your Self so that now there are two of you in your mind. The image standing outside of the "you" that is feeling pain is non-feeling and logical - sort of like Mr. Spock from Star Trek.

2. Slip your spirit into the non-feeling self for a few moments. Gauge the situation with logic and ask the following questions: What exactly am I feeling? Why am I feeling like this? This is a loaded question and will take time for you to figure out. Be patient with yourself. The answer you come up with will help you avoid this type of pain in the future. "Now that I know why I feel this way, what are the steps I can take in the future to be free of this type of infliction? Be honest and brave in thinking about your answer.

3. Now think about the person or organization that caused you pain and ask yourself these questions. What motivated them to cause me pain? Do I believe they felt good causing me pain? Is what they did important? Why?

4. Honestly consider the harmful personality and character traits of that person or organization. Are they something you emulate and would like to fashion yourself after? Are they something you absolutely do not want to be anything like?

5. Now that you've answered all these questions, take two actions.

- The first action is to practice courage and follow the steps you figured out to be free of this type of infliction right now. This is huge. Trust yourself. You know, deep inside, how to productively prevent yourself from being injured. Go ahead and do it. You will feel better about yourself every day you continue to take these steps. Be patient. This will take practice and you're bound to stumble now and then, and that's okay! Follow Dorothy Fields' advice when she wrote, "Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again."

- The second action is to resolve to do everything you can, with the thoughts you think and the actions you take, to be very different from the people or organizations that have caused you harm. This probably won't be as much of a stretch since the pain you experienced indicates you are already not very much like those who hurt you.

"The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury."

So, what are your intentions?

Here's to your courage and determination as you care for yourself with the highest honor, as your spirit glows.